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Leaving an Abusive Wife

Our society frequently downplays the abuse men go through. From sexual violence to physical abuse, our society believes that men just simply cannot be victims of inappropriate behavior by a woman. The aforementioned has tragic consequences: due to these attitudes, many men stay in abusive relationships, and refuse to come forward due to the social stigma. There are so many resources for women leaving abusive men, but there are rarely resources for men leaving an abusive marriage, regardless of their sexual orientation. If you’re in an abusive relationship, no matter what the gender of you or your spouse is, it’s important to understand that it’s not your fault, and your partner’s behavior is not acceptable.


Can Men Be Abused?

Yes, anyone and everyone can be abused by a significant other. Although women are generally less likely to be physically violent and cause significant harm, it isn’t impossible for women to be violent toward their significant others. Though some women may be significantly smaller than men, they are still capable of hurting their significant others, especially if they’re armed with knives or firearms. Furthermore, men have typically been raised not to hit a woman which may lead some men to hesitate to defend themselves. This can also occur due to a social and judicial stigma that men are generally presumed to be the aggressor. Some women will emotionally abuse their exes using threats of rape allegations, child abuse allegations, or blackmail in order to control their spouse.

Signs of an Abusive Wife – Leaving an Abusive Wife

There are signs that your spouse may be emotionally abusive or physically abusive. Due to sexist societal standards, many men feel pressured to cope with the emotional abuse instead of leaving the relationship. However, no matter what the standards are, there is no excuse for bad behavior. If your spouse humiliates you, threatens you, uses psychologically manipulative tactics such as gaslighting, is overbearing and controlling, and has a tendency to overreact, you may be in an unhealthy relationship. The aforementioned behaviors should be considered to be unacceptable in a relationship. If your spouse threatens you with physical violence, or has been physically violent with you, they’ve already crossed the line.

Leaving Can Be Difficult

Many men have trouble leaving an abusive relationship. Many of their reasons or concerns are similar to those of women. Although they may understand that their spouse is acting inappropriately, they may be afraid of leaving due to threats and blackmail. Some abusive women have threatened to turn the children against their father. In other cases, the father may have concerns about leaving the children alone with the mother for any amount of time. If you’re in an abusive relationship, and you’re concerned about what may happen to your children if you leave, your concerns are valid. Leaving your child alone with someone who has a violent history may be putting your children in danger. Many men are forced to consider this when determining whether or not it’s time to leave the relationship.

Concerns Regarding Custody – Leaving an Abusive Wife

It’s also common for men to believe that divorce heavily favors the woman in terms of alimony and custody. However, most judges believe that it’s in the child’s best interest to have a relationship with both parents. If you’re fit to be a parent, and you want to be involved in your child’s life, there’s a good chance that you will get at least some custody of the child. If your spouse has threatened to alienate the children, or turn them against you, it may be tempting to stay in order to preserve your relationship with the child. This is especially true in cases where one spouse has threatened to take the children out of state and refuse to reveal their location. Moreover, staying in a toxic or abusive relationship can teach your children that such behavior can and should be tolerated. This makes them more likely to fall into the same relationship pitfalls as they did not get to learn what a healthy and loving partnership looks like and how they should treat one another. If your spouse is threatening to take the children out of state, it’s important to get customized legal advice from an attorney before your spouse actually does this.

If Your Spouse Is Abusive

No matter what the genders are, abuse is never acceptable in a relationship or marriage. If you’re in an abusive relationship, there are resources available to you. To get started, you can dial 211, or visit the website to hear more about what resources are available to you. There is no excuse for domestic violence, and you do not have to stay in a relationship that is unsafe or unhealthy. The process of leaving an abusive spouse is often tumultuous and it’s frequently dangerous. If you have plans to leave your spouse, it may be a good idea to have a support system set up to help you with your exit.

When You’re Ready to Leave – Leaving an Abusive Wife

If you’re in an abusive relationship, and you’re ready to leave, hiring an attorney can help protect you and your family from an abusive spouse. If you’re ready to explore your options, contact CoilLaw today for an initial consultation.



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