Five Ways to Prevent an Affair
There are many reasons people begin affairs. Some people are unsatisfied with their marriage and choose to have an affair instead of ending the marriage. Other people pathologically believe the grass is greener on the other side. Many times, affairs begin for a complicated mix of reasons. And though there’s no way to completely prevent affairs, it is possible to start building a good foundation for your marriage that can make affairs less likely to occur. Even if your marriage has already been damaged by infidelity, it is still possible to save the marriage, rebuild trust, and practice skills that facilitate openness and honesty for the future.
Open and Honest Conversations – How to prevent affairs in marriage
Having open and honest conversations is important for your marriage. Many people cheat because they’re unsatisfied in their relationships, and it isn’t uncommon for those people not to communicate their lack of satisfaction with their spouse. If your spouse isn’t meeting your needs, it’s important to discuss this with them openly and honestly. It isn’t fair to expect your spouse to meet needs they aren’t even aware that you have, and then cheat on them because they didn’t meet your needs. When your spouse isn’t meeting your expectations, it may be a good idea to tell them so they have a chance to improve. Alternatively, if these expectations cannot be met, you and your spouse can work together to find a solution that will work for both of you.
Checking in with Your Spouse
Ideally, your spouse will be up front and honest with you about any expectations or needs that are unmet. However, that doesn’t always happen. Therefore, it may be a good idea to check in with your spouse every now and then and see how they’re feeling, or if there’s anything that they’re missing. One of the best ways to prevent the issues that commonly lead to infidelity is to ensure your marriage is a place where you and your spouse can have honest conversations about expectations without resentment or defensiveness. Checking in with your spouse can help open up a line of communication that may be very valuable down the road.
Don’t Put Yourself in Tempting Situations –
How to prevent affairs in marriage
You’ve probably heard it before: those with the strongest willpower exercise it the least. The same may be true when it comes to preventing affairs. You shouldn’t have friends of the opposite sex (or same sex, depending on your situation) that aren’t interested in being your spouse’s friend as well. Furthermore it may be a good idea not to place yourself in situations where you may be a little too tempted to cheat. Depending on the boundaries you’ve set up with your spouse, you may decide not to spend time alone with people you may be tempted to cheat with. This includes isolated communication or electronic interactions with these people whether it be public or private.
Do Something New
Putting effort into trying new things together is often an important part of preventing a marriage from turning stale. It doesn’t have to be a big thing either. Simply trying a new restaurant, or a new activity can keep the spark alive. Many people are attracted to the idea of an affair because it’s new and exciting. Sadly, these people tend to overvalue the novelty and undervalue the stability of their current marriage. Oftentimes, people get involved in an affair and become addicted to the novelty and excitement of the affair. By trying new things together, you and your spouse may be less tempted to seek out excitement elsewhere .
Consider Therapy –
How to prevent affairs in marriage
If you and your spouse are going through a rough patch, it may be a good idea to seek both individual counseling and couple’s counseling to fix issues before they become even larger issues. A lot of marriages suffer because of poor communication skills. A therapist can help couples work together and communicate better than before. Oftentimes, couples who are able to work through these issues are able to come out stronger than before. If an emotional affair has already begun to form in your marriage, therapy may be an essential part of healing the marriage and preventing further problems.
Are You Ready for Divorce?
Contrary to what many people believe, it is possible for marriages to survive infidelity. However, not all marriages are able to survive such a betrayal, especially when the wayward spouse is unrepentant, and unwilling to change. In these cases, divorce may be necessary for both parties to move on from the affair. At CoilLaw, our attorneys are experts in the kind of high-conflict divorces that often come with affairs. If you’re ready to file for divorce, you need an attorney who can fight for your rights. Contact CoilLaw to get started with an initial consultation.