Does Marriage Counselling Work?
If you’re trying to save your marriage, you may be wondering whether or not it’s actually worth it to go to marriage counselling. I mean does marriage counselling work? It does! And it’s generally good for couples to try it as soon as they need help.
Can Marriage Counselling Save a Marriage?
Yes! Couple’s counselling can do wonders for a marriage. Not only can couple’s counselling save a marriage, but it can also provide couples with tools to prevent problems in the future. Individual therapy is also recommended for those who are going through a tough time in their marriage. A lot of people would be surprised at the marriages that have come back from the brink of divorce. If you’re going through a tough time in your marriage, it may be a good idea to try couple’s counselling before getting a divorce. Divorce is a permanent solution to what could be a temporary problem, and divorce tends to bring even more problems. In some cases, it may even be easier to save the marriage than get a divorce.
How Effective Is Couple’s Counselling?
Couple’s counselling is very effective, but it’s not always done soon enough. Many people walk into a therapist’s office when it’s far too late. A lot of social and gender norms have acted as obstacles to marriage counselling. For example, some men may feel emasculated by any form of therapy. Or some people may feel stigmatized by the fact that they need marriage counselling. The latter is particularly common in communities where divorce is taboo or unacceptable. It’s estimated that 70% of couples who go through counselling are able to save their marriage. This success rate may be higher for couples who are able to get into a counselor’s office sooner rather than later.
Does Marriage Counselling Mean that Your Marriage Is Over?
No, not at all! A lot of people struggle to admit that they need marital counselling because they’re worried about being perceived as weak or incompetent. However, society has done us a big disservice. Children primarily learn how marriage works by observing their parents. This is why children of divorce are more likely to get divorced themselves. Not only that, but prior to adulthood, most children receive no interpersonal education about how to manage conflict in a marriage, or how to have a healthy marriage. Marriage requires skills that many people were never given the opportunity to learn. If you’re struggling in your marriage, it’s not too late to go learn the skills necessary to save your marriage and prevent conflict in the future. Marriage counselling is completely normal—in fact, it may not be normal enough! If you’re still fighting for your marriage, definitely try counselling.
Can You Fix a Marriage without Counselling?
You may be able to fix your marriage without a counsellor. The problem with this approach is that many people only start taking action when problems get really large. Once that fails, they go to marriage counselling—where they should have been months—or even years—ago. One of the main reasons marriage counselling fails is that people go far too late. When it comes to repairing a marriage, it’s important for both couples to pay attention at the very first sign of trouble. Don’t brush it off as something that you’ll just get through without any work. The second you realize that something is off, is the precise time you need to begin working on it. It’s often the case that the longer a problem goes unsolved in a marriage, the worse it gets.
If You’re in My Office, It’s Already too Late
This is the title of divorce lawyer James Sexton’s book because, by the time you get to his office, it’s already too late to save the relationship. His entire book is dedicated to the little things you can do to save your marriage before it gets to a place where you can no longer fix things without the help of a professional. Also, in order to get a marriage to survive, both parties need to be dead set on making it work. If one party has already checked out, or is unwilling to make it work, it can be too late to save the marriage. This can happen in cases where a person has been hurt over and over again and is no longer interested in doing the work necessary because they’ve lost faith in the marriage. Don’t let your marriage get to a point where it’s too late. Couple’s counselling can save marriages—so don’t wait!
When You’re Ready for Divorce
If you’ve decided that you’re ready to proceed with the divorce process, contact CoilLaw today to get started on your consultation.
