If you’re about to begin the divorce process, you may be ready to scream it from the rooftops and tell everyone you know. Though you may be eager to get the process over, your spouse may not feel the same. In fact, a lot of people feel broken and lost after divorce. Even people who have no history of depression or mental illness may experience episodes of depression and, in some cases, suicidal ideation. Therefore, if you’re going to announce your divorce, make sure you do it with the same respect and compassion that you’d like to be shown during this difficult time.
Be Careful What You Post
Facebook doesn’t necessarily need to know about your divorce the moment you’ve decided that you want to end the marriage. In fact, some attorneys even go as far as advising their clients not to change their relationship status until the divorce is finalized. Because divorce is such a difficult time, it isn’t uncommon for people to become upset over seeing their spouse change a relationship status. This is especially true if you’re announcing a new romantic relationship as well. It’s not uncommon for people to make the divorce process even more difficult once they find out their spouse has a new romantic interest. If you do decide to announce your divorce on social media, make sure you don’t say anything that you wouldn’t want a judge to look at in court. Since pretty much anything is allowed to be used as evidence in a divorce court, your spouse could use your status updates, and other content from your social media account.
Don’t Discuss the Terms
If you have thoughts such as, “I’m really gonna make him pay,” or “I’m gonna make sure she doesn’t get anything,” it may be a good idea not to vocalize such thoughts. And definitely don’t put those thoughts in text or on social media. If you feel as though you’re getting a really sweet deal in your divorce, you may want to keep that information to yourself. Remember it’s not over until the divorce is finalized. And, even if your divorce is finalized, it may not be a great idea to advertise the terms of your divorce. Even though your divorce is finalized, your spouse can still complicate your life. For example, if you brag about hidden assets, your ex could still go back and ask the court to award them any assets that were hidden during the divorce.
Wait until Your Spouse Knows
Don’t announce your divorce before you’ve told your spouse that you intend to file for divorce.
When people feel as though they’ve been blindsided by divorce papers, they can react explosively. A lot of the extreme behaviors seen during the divorce process come from a place of hurt. Your spouse finding out through word of mouth, or social media, may motivate them to cope with their pain in rather extreme ways. The best way to protect your interests is to hold off on announcing the divorce until your spouse has already been informed. In fact, even if your spouse already knows that you intend to file for divorce, you may not want to announce the divorce until it’s been filed, when it’s done, or perhaps not at all. It’s not uncommon for couples to reconcile and decide to work through the issues causing marital strain. Therefore, it’s much better to wait for the divorce to be finalized before telling others that you’re getting a divorce.
Be respectful when announcing your divorce. For a lot of people, divorce is a clean slate. A lot of people see divorce as “freedom” or a new beginning. However, it’s important to remember that not everyone sees divorce with such optimism. In fact, many people experience intense feelings of depression during the divorce process. Because these feelings can be so overwhelming, some people experience suicidal ideation and, tragically, some people even end their own lives. When you’re considering how to announce your divorce, remember that it’s important to announce your divorce in a manner that’s respectful and considerate to your spouse. It’s possible that they don’t see the divorce process as an optimistic time—even though you might.
When You’re Going through Divorce
If you’re going through the divorce process, CoilLaw is here for you. At CoilLaw, our attorneys are experts in fighting for our clients’ rights and helping them advocate for their best interests. If you’re considering divorce, or if you’re ready to file for divorce, contact CoilLaw today to find out what your options are.