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Financial infidelity, credit card debt, and different money personalities—oh my!!

 

In your marriage, what are you doing to manage your finances as a team? It’s an important question that every couple should have the answer to. However, a surprising number of couples struggle to answer the question articulately. Since most of us were raised in a culture where discussing finances is improper, bringing up the topic with a significant other, or even a spouse, can cause tension and anxiety. But, if financial and marital experts are to be believed, discussing finances with your spouse is a crucial part of a happy marriage.

Happy Couples Are on the Same Page:

Though it’s not a fun conversation, discussing finances with your spouse needs to be done sooner rather than later—and it’s better to discuss later than never. In a study conducted by Ramsay Solutions, 94% of couples in happy marriages reported that they discuss their financial goals together. Only 45% of those in “okay marriages” and those in “in-crisis marriages,” report discussing finances together. These statistics imply that discussing finances together may be a large component of a happy marriage.

How Does Your Spouse View Money?

You probably know your significant other’s love language, but do you know their money personality? Do you know your money personality? According to the theory, there are spenders, savers, shoppers, debtors, and investors. Each personality type has its strengths and weaknesses. Knowing both your personality type and your spouse’s personality type can help each of you effectively navigate any personality clashes. Also, a person’s personal values and upbringing have a tremendous influence on how they spend their money. The more you understand about your significant other’s view of money, the better prepared you’ll be when issues arise.

Be Aware of Credit Card Debt:

In his New York Times Bestseller, Smart Couples Finish Rich, David Bach ranked not taking credit debt seriously as the #2 biggest financial mistakes couples make. Bach goes on to say that if one or both parties is consistently running up credit card debt, high interest rates are almost certainly going to cause tension in the relationship. This theory is backed up by statistics too: couples with more consumer debt tend to argue more about finances. In order to be on the same page about debt, financial experts suggest listing your debts openly and honestly. Collaborate with your significant other on the best way to tackle the debt, and create rules for taking out more debt.

Avoid Financial Infidelity at All Cost:

If you and your spouse are truly managing finances as a team, you need to make sure you never hide purchases from your spouse. While this may sound obvious, 1 in every 3 married people admit to committing financial infidelity. A lot of people commit financial infidelity in order to make frivolous purchases the family can’t afford without starting a fight. Jeff Opdyke, author of Financially Ever After, reveals he’s seen couples divorce over financial infidelity. Even after years of happy marriage, some couples divorce when financial infidelity is discovered. And, according to Opdyke, it’s always discovered eventually.

When Fighting over Finances Becomes Too Much:

Fighting over finances can take a huge toll on a marriage. This is especially true when one or both parties has committed financial infidelity. While a lot of these issues can be avoided with open and honest conversations, these issues have been the downfall of many great marriages.  If your spouse’s financial infidelity or recklessness has caused your marriage to fail, you may have questions or concerns about how their behavior will impact your divorce. At CoilLaw, we understand this and we are here to answer any questions you may have. If you have questions about divorce after financial infidelity, do not hesitate to give us a call.

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