Can I Record My Spouse and I Fighting?
Legally Speaking…
Whether or not you can record your spouse will depend on a lot of factors. Some states allow you to record audio of your spouse without their consent as long as you’re present during the recording. Other states may require that you have the consent of all parties involved before you begin recording audio. Video surveillance is another issue. While you can generally have cameras on your own property, you can’t have cameras (especially hidden ones) in areas where a person would have a reasonable expectation of privacy. For example, you cannot have hidden cameras in your bathroom or in your bedroom. While the laws in some states may allow you to place hidden audio-only recording devices in those rooms, you’d have to be present during all recordings. You could not put hidden recording devices in rooms where a person would have a reasonable expectation of privacy and then leave.
How Useful Is the Recording?
While you may be free to record your spouse fighting, there may not be any purpose to having that recording. While verbal abuse is unacceptable, it does not generally have any impact on a divorce proceeding—unless threats to a person’s safety are made. While recordings may show that your spouse is a bad spouse, that typically does not affect what the spouse is legally entitled to in a divorce. Recording a fight may prove that your spouse is a narcissist, but your spouse’s diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder is not going to massively impact issues such as the division of assets. You’d need to review all recordings with an attorney so that you could understand how the contents would affect your case. In most cases, while the fight would be humiliating for the spouse being recorded, it wouldn’t be particularly useful in a divorce case.
Recordings in Custody Cases
Recordings may contain useful information when it comes to custody battles. If you record your spouse physically abusing your children, for example, that may be useful when you’re fighting for custody. Admissions of child abuse may also be useful when determining custody arrangements. Some statements about the children may also demonstrate that a parent is unfit and should not have custody at the moment. For example, if you record your spouse talking about using street drugs in the child’s presence, that may be useful evidence in you favor when custody arrangements are being decided.
When You’re Being Abused
Recordings of physical abuse may be useful in obtaining a protective order. However, if you did not record the actual abuse as it happened, not all hope is lost. You can use photographs of injuries, records from the hospital, police reports, and eyewitness reports from friends and family as well. If you have been physically abused, it is possible that your spouse will do it again. If you can safely report the abuse to another person—ideally someone at the hospital, doctor’s office, or a filing a police report—make sure to give that person as much information as possible. If you have photos and videos and documentation of the abuse, it may be in your best interest to have a trusted friend, family member, or attorney hold on to those for you. Your own statements about the abuse may also be useful in court. Presenting them in court may help you get a protective order.
Posting the Recordings on Social Media
If you have recordings of your spouse acting like a fool during an argument, it is very unlikely to be in your best interest to make those public. While posting such content may be legal in some circumstances, that doesn’t mean it’s a good idea. In some cases, even if the recordings expose your ex’s verbally abusive behavior, the publicity of the recording may still backfire. This is especially true if you include personal information or identifying information in the recordings. For example, posting your fights to YouTube with your spouse’s face and name readily available could be considered to be a smear campaign. If you have children, posting your fights on social media may come back to haunt you in court—even if your ex was clearly in the wrong in the fight. It is best to not post your fights to social media, especially without running the idea by your attorney first. Your attorney is very unlikely to think that posting that is a good idea.
When You Need Legal Advice
It’s important to consider legal advice from a quality source when you have a highly contentious divorce. Contact us to set up your initial consultation.
