It Depends…
The court’s action and willingness to get involved may depend upon the allegations and the likelihood that your child is in danger. For example, if you think that your ex’s partner is abusing children, but their partner does not have an established history of abusing children, and there is no evidence to suggest abuse, the court may be less likely to take action. On the other hand, if your spouse is dating someone with an extensive history of abusing children, then the court may be more likely to take action in order to protect your children. It should be understood, however, that your spouse has the right to date whomever they please—even if they want to date child abusers. While the court may rule that the child is not to be left alone with your ex’s new partner, the court would not rule that your ex needs to break up with their partner, but they can say that the abusive partner cannot be around the children.
Time to Call DCFS, Right?
Immediately calling DCFS may not be your best option. If your spouse is dating someone whom you have concerns about, you may not want to immediately call DCFS. DCFS’s investigations can be very invasive and may even be traumatic for the children. DCFS will likely investigate you as well in order to ensure that you’re not making false allegations. If you have concerns that your child is experiencing abuse at the hands of your ex’s new partner, contact your family law attorney immediately for guidance on how to proceed. If your child tells you that they’ve been abused, make sure you document everything that they say. You should avoid questioning children, especially young children, as they may give incorrect information unintentionally.
Can My Ex Lose Custody for Dating a Child Abuser?
Your ex may not lose custody for simply dating a child abuser. However, they may lose custody if they knowingly fail to take reasonable precautions in order to keep the child safe from potential abuse by their new paramour. For example, if your ex is dating a person who has a known history of abusing children, and your ex knows their partner is abusing the children but does nothing, the court may take action in order to keep the children safe. This may mean a loss of custody. Courts may be slow to act. Unfortunately, courts are reactive as opposed to being proactive. This means that, unless abuse has already occurred, courts are less likely to get involved or take corrective action.
Can I Ensure the Kids Don’t See Their Partner?
It is not likely that you’d be able to prevent your children from having any and all contact with the individual, particularly if there is no established risk to the child. However, there can be protections put in place in order to ensure that abuse does not occur. If the court finds that there is a substantial risk of abuse occurring, they may rule that your children are never to be left unattended with the abusive partner. This matter can become complicated if your ex and their partner live together. You would not likely be successful in legally forcing your ex to quit living with their partner and, as previously mentioned, you likely wouldn’t be successful in legally forcing your ex to break up with their partner. As previously mentioned, in serious cases where there is sufficient evidence to support that the paramour poses a substantial risk to the child, the court may rule that the child is unable to have any contact with the paramour. While this is not the same as being forced to break up with the abusive partner, it would likely come down to choosing the partner or the kids.
What Should You Do When You Suspect Abuse?
If you suspect your child is experiencing abuse, make sure you contact your family law attorney as soon as you possibly can for guidance. If your child says anything to you indicating abuse, document it with as much details as possible. Make sure that you take photographs and video evidence of any injuries that the child has that may indicate abuse. Depending on the circumstances, your child may need to be evaluated by a professional who’s trained in evaluating children who have experienced child abuse. Your attorney can help you navigate this manner more thoroughly.
When You Have Custody Concerns
If you have concerns about your child’s safety when they’re with your ex, having customized legal advice may be the best way to help ensure your child’s safety. At CoilLaw, our attorneys are experienced in high-conflict divorces. We help those who are fighting for custody protect their families. If you’re in the midst of a custody battle and you need legal advice, contact CoilLaw today to set up your initial consultation.
