Five Things to Consider about the “Trad-Wife Movement”
The “trad-wife” movement, short for “traditional wife” refers to the growing number of social media influencers glorifying traditional gender roles where the woman stays at home and the man works. While this could be beneficial for some couples, not all couples would be able to sustain such an arrangement, as many families heavily rely upon dual incomes to support the needs of their families. Furthermore, some argue that this could put women in a bad spot if the husband were to die or leave unexpectedly. Without education and work history, it can be very difficult, if impossible to make ends meet. If you are considering becoming a traditional wife, it may be worth considering all of your options before making a decision.
Going Back to School Is Hard
When divorce happens, it’s not always possible for the spouse who was financially dependent to just go back to school and begin a career. It’s never too late to do that thing that you’ve always been meaning to do. However, going to college as an 18-year-old will be much easier than going to college as a single 36-year-old with five young children. After the divorce, those who were financially dependent on their spouse almost always need to find a way to support themselves and any children. This can be very difficult if you do not have any relevant work experience or education.
Alimony Isn’t a Guarantee
The laws vary from state to state, but alimony isn’t necessarily guaranteed just because you’ve never worked and/or haven’t had any education. In most cases, an alimony award isn’t enough to completely replace a person’s income. Most people who get alimony also have to get a full-time job. While lifelong alimony still exists in some states, it’s very unusual and is awarded almost exclusively in cases where the dependent spouse is disabled. So, not only is alimony not guaranteed, it’s also not usually enough income for most people to live off, especially in the long run. Also, your spouse would need to be able to pay alimony on top of all of their expenses. Those who already have some education and work experience will likely have less financial stress going back into the workforce as a divorced person.
Prenuptial Agreements and Postnuptial Agreement Protect Both Parties
If you are dead set on becoming a stay-at-home mother (or father), you and your spouse may want to consider getting a pre- or post-nuptial agreement. A prenuptial agreement is designed to protect both parties in the event of a divorce. While you may have seen men in the media talk about “making sure she doesn’t get a dime,” most prenuptial agreements do not completely absolve one party of any financial obligation. And prenuptial agreements that are one-sided may be thrown out in court. If you and your spouse decide to sign a pre-nuptial agreement, you should both consider hiring your own attorneys to represent your interests and ensure that the prenuptial agreement is fair for both parties. This agreement can help a person who is giving up his or her career (or potential career) get some additional protection in the event of divorce.
Social Media Lies
What you see on social media generally doesn’t reflect reality. A lot of the popular female influencers promoting the idea of a “trad-wife” do have a source of income outside of their husbands, as a large social media following can be quite lucrative. If these women were to get divorced, they might not be in the same boat as someone who didn’t have a large social media following with ad revenue and monetized content. While many of these influencers promote the idea of traditional gender roles being key to marital happiness, it’s important to remember that, unless you live with a couple, it’s very difficult to determine how happy they are with any degree of certainty. Furthermore, what works for some couples may not work for others. Nobody is inherently “better” because of how they choose to live their lives.
You Can Have the Best of Both Worlds
It is possible to be a stay-at-home mom while retaining the security necessary to get back on your feet if your husband became unable to work or unexpectedly decided to leave. Getting a college education before having children can help ensure that you aren’t stuck in a bad spot if the worst happened. If you do decide to stay at home and tend to the children, keeping up-to-date in your field with relevant certifications and training courses can help make a big difference if you’re suddenly thrown into the workforce. If you are considering divorce, and you’re ready to explore your options, contact CoilLaw today to begin your initial consultation.
