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Being Your Own Valentine after Divorce

If this is your first Valentine’s Day alone, you may be feeling a little down in the dumpsbut fear not: with the divorce rates hovering around 50%, many people are spending their first Valentine’s Day alone this year. Though your first year as a divorced person may be difficult, spending the holiday alone doesn’t have to be an emotionally devastating event. Not only can you make it through all the Valentine’s celebrations, you can do it with a smile on your face. You can be your own Valentine this year, and you can make it a day all about self-care and relaxation.

Do Something for Your Mental Health

Maybe you’ve just finalized your divorce, or, perhaps you’ve just filed papers. Wherever you are in the divorce process, seeking help from a mental health professional should be a priority. Having a qualified professional guide you through all the complicated emotions that come with a divorce will be essential to moving forward in life and coping with the end of your marriage. If you’re already working with a therapist, you may benefit from reading self-help books that are relevant to the progress that you’re making with a therapist. Reading self-help books along with going to therapy can enhance the progress you’re already making. If you’re already working with a therapist, be sure to ask them which books they think you can benefit from.

Do Something for Your Physical Health

Taking care of your physical health is just as important as taking care of your mental health. Be your own valentine this year by getting some physical activity in. You can try something new, or you can simply go for a walk. Whatever you do to get active, pick something that excites you and interests you. Research has shown time and time again that getting sufficient physical activity multiple times a week can reduce stress, increase happiness, and even help you sleep better. Also, if your resolution is to improve your physical health in 2022, getting out and being active is a great way for you to be your own Valentine this year.

Do Something for Your Emotional Health

If you’re feeling down in the dumps about being single on Heart Day, show yourself love and compassion by spoiling yourself a little. This might mean buying yourself a small gift, or it could mean doing something that you find relaxing. Whatever it is that you do to spoil yourself, make sure it’s something totally just for you. Remember, there are no rules about who can be your Valentine. So, if you’re your own Valentine this year, the ball is 100% in your court and you are fully responsible for making this day awesome and all about you.

Spend Time with Loved Ones

Contrary to popular opinion, being single doesn’t necessarily mean spending Valentine’s Day alone. Many happy couples have decided that Valentine’s Day is a lame holiday and nothing but an excuse for jewelry companies and chocolatiers to cash in on those who like to celebrate holidays. You very well may have married friends, or friends in a relationship who feel this way. If so, they’d likely be more than happy to spend the holiday hanging out with you. Or, you could always spend the holiday with your family members. And, if you have kids, they will likely be more than happy to receive candy from you on this day.

Reframe Your Ideas about the Holiday

Sometimes therapists advise their clients to do an exercise called reframing. Reframing allows people who are experiencing cognitive distortions to re-examine their perspective and look at situations in a more positive light. For example, you may be feeling down about being single on Valentine’s Day. However, you may be able to reframe your negative thoughts about the holiday into something more beneficial. There are even apps available that help users reframe their thoughts into more helpful and productive thoughts.

When You’re Ready to File

Spending Valentine’s Day alone might not be your number one choice. However, spending the day alone is a lot better than staying in a bad marriage. If you know it’s time to move on, CoilLaw is here for you. Our talented legal team is ready to guide you through this difficult process, every step of the way. If you’re ready to file for divorce, contact CoilLaw today.


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